Call off the search.
It's right here.
Sunday 6 December 2009
Saturday 5 December 2009
A CONVERSATION WITH A CEO
CEO: "....................... and as it's often been said, CEO's are the loneliest people in the world."
ME: "No. The loneliest people in the world become CEO's."
Was I just trying to be smart?
No.
It's obvious.
The more mastery, the less intimacy.
The more intimacy, the less mastery.
ME: "No. The loneliest people in the world become CEO's."
Was I just trying to be smart?
No.
It's obvious.
The more mastery, the less intimacy.
The more intimacy, the less mastery.
Thursday 3 December 2009
A VINTAGE OCCASION
ME: ............. and to go with that we'll have a bottle of your Barolo 2005.
WAITER: Very good, sir.
Waiter brings the bottle.
WAITER: How's that?
ME: Mmm. It's a Barolo, but not the one on your wine list. This is a 2006. Could you bring me the 2005 please?
WAITER: Ah. Sorry about that. Goes off to collect correct wine and returns.
Er, I'm sorry but we don't actually have the 2005 wine.
ME: I see. Let's have another look at the list. We'll choose another. This Chianti Classico 2005 will be fine.
Waiter disappears and reappears with the bottle.
ME: That also appears not to be the 2005, but the 2006.
WAITER: Ah, Yes. I don't think we have the 2005.
ME: OK. How about you just take the wine list and tell me which of your advertised wines you do have?
WAITER: Returning. I've had a look and it appears this Tempranillo is the only one.
ME: Interesting. And looking at the wine list, that wine isn't the same as advertised either. It is, again, a different vintage.
WAITER: ...................................
ME: So none of the wines on your list is actually available; only a different set of wines not advertised....
WAITER: ....................................
ME: I'm sure you can see the problem here.
WAITER: Yes.
ME: And I'm sure a Trading Standards Officer would see it too.
WAITER: ..................................
ME: Well, here's what I suggest. As I am pointing this error out to you and therefore saving you a lot of potential hassle and cost, not to say quite possibly a prosecution, I suggest you provide me free of charge with a decent wine of your choosing and I'll agree not to call trading standards in the morning to give you a chance to sort the matter out.
WAITER: ............................ OK then.
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