Little madam and I are left to fend for ourselves. Fending brings with it normally disallowed pleasures:
- sleeping in alpine sleeping bags
- avoiding totally all acts of washing and bathing
- leaving teeth uncleaned
- Warburton's white bread
- everything fried
- farting without apology
- as much tv as you can handle
- pies
- chocolate for breakfast
- a complete ban on vitamins
But big madam returns tonight. And we have missed her. Our straight and narrow can only be deserted for so long before the pleasure of straying palls. Normal service will be resumed imminently.
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